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She nodded. “And after? Is that part true too?”
“Yes. That was survival.”
She smiled softly at me. “And now?”
I sniffled because damn it all I was tearing up just thinking about how happy I was with Leo. “I think you know how we met. I’m as surprised as anyone at where we are now. I love him and I want to make him happy.” I glanced around the room until I found him smiling and laughing with Greg. “If I have my research and Leo then I have pretty much everything I could ever want.”
There were parts of my past that were incredible. Being in a long-term relationship with Daniel and Luke had its up and downs but at the core, we were three people who were desperate to survive and only knew one way to get through our pain. I was never in love with them and they were never in love with me. There were times when I didn’t think I’d ever be happy with one person, that it wasn’t possible to be in a relationship over many years because of how often circumstances changed. But now I knew there were some people who were more than a friend, more than a partner in the bedroom, more than a companion in life. There were some people, like Leo, who were your other half.
CHAPTER 5
“William!” Marie gave him a hug. “How are things?”
My brother was a quiet man, generally. At least I thought he was. Honestly, I didn’t know the guy all that well. Yes we grew up together, but William was older than me. He went off to college early just like I did. He rarely came home until he completed his MBA. By then I was gone. I always felt that he was in my corner and that I could call him if I needed him, but at the end of the day he chose to work for Edmund and that made me want to forget him.
The boy I knew hated our father and the way he treated our mothers. I still didn’t understand why he accepted the job . . . unless it was all about the money. Maybe William was more superficial than I realized.
Tonight he wore a black suit with a black tie. It made him appear grim, especially when combined with his nearly black hair, dark eyes, and broad shoulders. He reminded me of Orson Wells when he played Mr. Rochester in Jane Eyre.
He cracked a sardonic smile for Marie. “I’ve seen you more in the last six months than I have in the last six years.”
“And what’s that supposed to mean?”
“That things are going well.” He gave her shoulder a brotherly tap. “How’s that bastard treating you?”
“Greg might be a bastard but no one dares to mess with me. They’re all too afraid of him.”
“Good man.” William nodded before turning to me. “Sister dear, and how are you?” He folded me into a quick but warm embrace that gave me hope one day we’d find some sort of strange sibling equilibrium.
“Until about fifteen minutes ago I was doing very well.”
All traces of happiness disappeared from his face. “I’m sorry.”
I believed he was sorry. What I couldn’t understand was how he could be part of all this. Or maybe I was the extreme one, going to criminal lengths to separate myself from it. “It’s fine. In a couple of hours I’ll go back to my real life and forget tonight ever happened.”
I was probably a bit too flippant and sarcastic because William stiffened.
Marie shifted uncomfortably. “Well I’m pretty sure that’s my cue to leave. I’ve had this conversation enough times to know what happens next. William, I hope I’ll see you later?” He nodded. “And Esme I’ll see you in a minute.” She glared at William. “And if I don’t I’m coming for you first.”
My brother found her threat incredibly amusing. “Is that so, half pint?”
Marie rolled her eyes. “We’re not ten anymore.” Then she flipped him the bird and walked away.
We both watched her walk away. I had no idea what to say or what could possibly be resolved between us at a party like this. So I waited, hoping my big brother had some wisdom to share.
Turns out he had a confession instead. He swallowed hard and fiddled with the button on his jacket. “I don’t know what to call you.” He shrugged. “That’s why I keep calling you sister. You were always Rosie but now everyone calls you Esme. I want you to be comfortable but I don’t how to change your name in my head.”
That was really kind of sweet. “You can still call me Rosie. I’m still your sister.”
His right eye twitched at the corner. “But you’re not, are you? You changed your name, you don’t come home, you treat me like a stranger.”
My name and my clothes were my armor but did any of that matter with my brother, the only person who was in the trenches with me, even if it was only for a short time? “You left for college and never came home. I learned how to survive from you.”
He winced. “I never apologized for that. I feel like I abandoned you to him and caused this whole mess.”
“Edmund caused this whole mess. This is his world.” I waved at the room filled with nicely dressed athletes and agents. “He’s the one who goes through women and discards them. He’s the one who cares more about money than being a father. He’s the reason I left.”
William’s jaw flexed. “I know.”
“I won’t be a part of it. He can summon me to as many parties as he wishes but I’ll never work for him again.” God, how I hated that I was here now. If I could grow wings and fly away I would.
“Again?” William repeated slowly. In the blink of an eye his affection for me was replaced by rage.
Pure. Wild. Rage. And I didn’t know why. “Yes again.” I waved my hand through the air as if the action would magically transport the years of memories into William’s brain.
Oddly, he didn’t get the unspoken information and instead grew even angrier, hovering over me as he growled, “When did you work for the company?” He practically spit out the words and I had no idea why this information made him so angry.
“I didn’t work for the company. I worked for Edmund.”
His eyes blazed and I swear he was about to punch the wall or maybe me? I really couldn’t be sure because I didn’t know why he was so upset. “When?”
“Uh, I don’t know. Until about five years ago? Whenever it was I got my doctorate.”
He shook with anger. He actually shook. “That fucking bastard.”
“William . . . how could you not know this?” Did he honestly think I came into the office for fun? “You worked for father then. Didn’t he tell you why I was there?”
I didn’t know how to feel about my brother’s reaction. Part of me was scared of how much anger boiled inside him. Part of me was fascinated. The fascination won out. I really didn’t know my brother anymore. I had no idea if he was coming apart at the seams because he couldn’t control himself, or if he was shocked, or what. All I knew was that in front of me I had what I usually considered to be a six-foot-five teddy bear about to explode.
“What’s going on here?” Leo slid in beside me shooting daggers at William as he dropped a tender kiss on my cheek. “Are you all right?” he murmured against my ear.
“I’m fine.” I snuggled into his side because I liked the security of being pressed up against Leo.
“Of course she’s fine. What the hell kind of bastard do you take me for?” William shoved his large hand through his dark hair. “And who the hell are you?”
“Leo Hancock,” Leo thrust his hand out. “We met a couple of months ago. I work for Marie and I’m in love with your sister.”
William’s eyes rounded. “You’re . . . what?” He smiled. “You have a boyfriend?”
I might have whiplash by the end of the night from all of the emotional extremes. “How about we start over. William, I’d like you to meet Leo. We’re living together now. He’s an agent at Bancroft Sports and I love him very much. Leo, this is my big brother William.”
The two men shook hands. The long kind of shake where they tried to crush each other with their muscles and eye daggers. “So what are you two talking about?” Leo smiled while glaring.
“We were just getting some facts straight. Willia
m was unaware of the work I did for Edmund.”
Leo took his hand back but the glare stayed firmly in place.
“I’m still not clear on what that work was, sister dear.” William said with what appeared to be painfully clenched teeth.
Leo kissed my temple. It was a vote of confidence and an admonishment all at once. “Careful.”
William didn’t like that. “Careful? Of me? Really?”
“Yes really,” I sighed. It felt nice to be near my brother and I wanted to keep this going, spend more time with him, but not at the expense of my objective. “I love you, William, but I don’t know you. In your position you should know just how manipulative and deceitful our father is.”
“Which is why I need to know what you did.” He stepped closer and lowered his voice. “I’m the same as you Rosie. Just the same.”
I searched his eyes trying to determine what just the same really meant. Of course we were the same. We had the same father. We shared the same issues. But William’s words and searching eyes implied more.
Rosie. We were in the trenches together. “William I—”
I reached for him but not before our father appeared at our sides. My hand fell away, a canyon opening up between us that felt dangerously wide until Leo squeezed me protectively against him.
I watched as William drew himself up to his full height, realizing just how alike we were. In a split second he shed the caring brother skin and slid back into his role as heir apparent. He wore that suit the same way I wore my dress. A costume and armor all rolled into one.
“My two children in the same place at the same time. What a rare sight indeed.”
I swear the air dropped ten degrees whenever my father was around. His silver hair didn’t help the illusion, either. It was as if he were made of ice inside and out.
William tucked his tie away. “I was just asking Rosalind about her latest research.” He didn’t look at or acknowledge Leo as his eyes moved from me to our father. “Fascinating stuff.”
“I’m sure it’s delightful.” Edmund might as well have patted me on the head, the condescending prick. “It’s Mr. Hancock, correct? Bancroft Sports?” He held his hand out and Leo shook it.
“I am, indeed. Wonderful party,” he said smooth as can be.
My skin crawled as Edmund’s eyes wandered to the place where Leo’s hand rested on my hip. His eyebrow lifted. “And dating my daughter?”
“Yes,” he said simply. He didn’t offer details. I loved him for that. But I also loved how he didn’t offer his first name or any other familiarities.
I didn’t offer any either.
To my surprise it was William who came to my rescue. “How’s the mapping project coming along, Rosie?”
I blinked at him for a moment because I wasn’t aware William knew about the mapping project. “Um, it’s—”
“The fundraiser was a smashing success,” Leo said proudly. “Dr. Brown’s research had the entire room stunned with fascination. They couldn’t pull their wallets out fast enough.” His thumb pressed a soothing circle on my hip. “Her work is groundbreaking, but I’m sure that’s no surprise to either of you. She must have been full of surprises as a child.”
William laughed. “There was this one time, Rosie rigged all the lights upstairs to go on and off at her command. It took me a fucking week to figure out she was the one turning my lights on in the middle of the night.”
“And off when you were in the shower.” I’d completely forgotten about that.
William groaned. “You scared the shit out of me.”
“You’re quite the troublemaker.” Leo’s eyes twinkled as he grinned at me.
“You have no idea,” Edmund drawled. He was clearly not amused by our walk down memory lane. “Rosalind I was hoping to have a word with you.” He waved in the direction of his home office.
All the hair on my arm rose up. Leo tucked me into his side.
William scowled at our father. “I actually have a few items to discuss with you as well. Let’s all retire to the office.”
“No,” Edmund said. “I need to speak to Rosalind alone. I’ll have her back in a few minutes.” Then he turned and left.
CHAPTER 6
“Don’t go,” Leo whispered against my ear. He held me close; his muscles coiled tight and ready to spring into action.
He didn’t want me leaving with my father. I didn’t want to leave with my father. On my top ten list of things I never wanted to do ever again was “Spend time alone with Edmund.” It filled all ten slots.
“It’s fine. I’ll send up a flair if I need help.”
“You better not need help,” he growled. “Or else I’ll have to murder him and then the cops will be involved and we really don’t want that.”
Is it bad that Leo’s threat of murder made me so happy? I hope not because just the words alone made me feel warm and safe and loved. Three things I was quickly becoming terribly addicted to. “There will be no murdering. He’s awful but harmless. I’ll be back soon.”
It was impressive how cool and collected I sounded when we both knew full well I was the exact opposite. I knew what would happen at the end of this conversation. I’d leave feeling drained, upset, and, most likely, so very angry.
Leo kissed me again, holding me just a little bit tighter. “Hurry back.”
I followed Edmund down the darkened hallway that led to his home office. Just like my childhood home, as well as our LA mansion, the London house, the ranch in Montana, the island in the Bahamas, and the Sydney house, this one was equipped with the highest security.
I noted the visible cameras in the hallway (the ones pointed at his office door) and knew there were just as many that were invisible to the eye. Probably hidden inside a light bulb or behind one of the ugly paintings that hung from the walls. Entering the office required a keycard and his handprint.
No retinal scan though, so not nearly as secure as some of his offices. That meant there weren’t as many sensitive documents here.
It also meant I could get back inside easy peasy, should I decide I needed to.
But then again, Edmund knew me well. Perhaps there was more here and he intentionally wanted me to believe his security was lower.
Or maybe I was seriously overthinking things.
It was a hazard I’d run into ever since he purchased the Renegades. There were villains everywhere, crosses and double crosses, agendas, and secret agents. Or not-so-secret agents. Capp and Dixon were killing me. I’d be more upset about their constant presence in my life if I thought they had a clue what was really going on. No, it was the private investigators who were the true pain in my ass.
I took a quick inventory of the office as Edmund closed the door. Six television screens on the left wall. Three were off, three were on, displaying data on his different businesses. I was willing to bet the other three were connected to the security feed for the party. On his desk there was a large computer screen, a laptop, and a briefcase. Closed.
“Have a seat.” He walked around me and behind his desk.
“I’ll stand.” When I was a kid I imagined the chairs in my father’s office were outfitted with ejection seats. If you said the wrong thing or didn’t do your job, he shot you out of his office like a missile.
Okay, I still imagined it. And yes, it was one of the reasons I didn’t want to sit. The other being I didn’t like the power dynamic, nor did I want to be comfortable. Comfort led to acceptance. I needed to be observant. Aware.
“Fine, Rosalind. Stand like a Neanderthal.”
I bit back a response that would go over my father’s head. “What do you want?”
I scanned the bookshelves. Mostly empty. One shelf was lined with files, another held photographs of Edmund with famous actors and political dignitaries—because we wouldn’t want anyone to miss how important my father was—while another held Renegades memorabilia. Stuff he’d had as long as I could remember.
I stared at it as my father spoke. “How seriou
s are you and Leo Hancock?”
“Pretty serious.” Dear old Dad didn’t need any more detail than that, nor was he owed an explanation.
“And who else is he dating? Or is it you? How many are in this relationship?”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t know, why don’t you ask your private investigators. They should know everything.” Beside the Renegades jersey and photograph was a football signed by every member of the Nashville team. Beside that was a photograph signed by the New York quarterback my father loved.
There wasn’t a single picture of me or my brother. Not even pictures of William with the Renegades.
“I’m asking you.” He began tapping the desk with a pen—a noise designed to draw my attention back to him.
Well fuck him.
“I don’t see why I should answer your question.”
“Jesus, Rosalind. I’m just asking if I have another problem on my hands. Am I going to be cleaning up another scandal? It’s Nashville all over again.”
My gaze snagged on the glittering Super Bowl ring, ignoring Edmund’s attempt to rile me up. This wasn’t Nashville all over again. Not even close. My father still thought the scandal he cleaned up was what happened at The Secret.
And if he truly thought that, then there was no way he had anything to do with what was happening now.
I turned back, fixing my calmest possible stare on the man who I shared some DNA with. “This is nothing like Nashville. I’ve repaid you many times over for my mistake.” It wasn’t the mistake he thought it was. Edmund believed five of his football players were involved in deviant sexual behavior with his daughter. (Those were his words, not mine.) He believed he paid those players off to disappear. He believed he gave hush money to authorities and news organizations to make the scandal disappear. There were pictures of us together at the club. There was video.
I released those photographs and videos on purpose. I needed to cover my tracks when the authorities got entirely too close to discovering my involvement in fixing games.